Lazy...and busy :)

Why is running always on the bottom of my to do list these days? I hate it, but at the same time, it's never enough for me to squeeze it in! Dang me! Here is my current week:

Monday - Packers in Monday Night Football, had to get home in time!
Tuesday - Had to bake cupcakes for the Halloween Potluck, buy decorations for it and rent a horror flick to play during. Yeah, it's great being the Chairperson (Ahem...sole member...) of the Social Committee at work!
Wednesday - Halloween! And got had to drop a friend off home on the way back from work and I didn't make it in the door until 8pm.

As I've said a million times, tomorrow is it! I'm gonna be good! I swear!

Boo on me!

I altered my workout plan last night and it totally back-fired on me! Of course, I was planning to continue my easing on in to my workouts in the gym upstairs with a little 30 minutes on the elliptical and treadmill again. But then my friend called and wanted me to meet him over on Michigan Ave. He was having dinner with his family up north when he called so I figured that gave me plenty of time until I had to meet him.

So, I decided to skip the gym and I'd walk all the way to Michigan (I work in the Loop)...go even farther north than where I had to meet him so I could pick up a few things and then circle back around to him. Figured it be at least a solid 30 minutes of walking.

Well, I headed out and within just a few blocks, I got sidetracked by a performance in Daley Plaza. Strike 1. I suck! But it was really cool...they were jump roping and flipping and doing all kinds of fun stuff! So, I stood and watched for about 10 minutes then got back on track. I realized I was starving, but I didn't want to eat anything big before dinner. Once I was across the river, I saw a Starbucks and headed on in to get a little sumthin' sumthin' in my belly. Strike 2.

I decide to call my friend to see how far out he is so that I can figure out how far off-course I can venture before I have to turn back. Turns out he drove down to Michigan Ave in rush hour traffic can was already there! Who the hell would have guessed?! So, I quickly walked to meet him and that was it. Strike 3. He gave me a ride home so I didn't even get in my usual 3/4 mile walk from the train to my house! I swear I had good intentions when I decided to skip the gym! I really, really did! Now I just feel guilty... :)

Ewwww

The workout yesterday sucked! Why? Because it was hard and it shouldn't have been! Augh! I hate that! I'm easing myself back in so I already knew I was only planning on spending about 30 minutes in there. I started on the Elliptical...but it was the Precor type, with elevation control, not the regular elliptical machines you see more often now. It has been years since I did the eleveation type. And it kicked my butt! I did only 15 minutes and I was sweating and needing to seriously get off before I got completely discouraged! So, I moved to the treadmill...to run, you ask? Nope! I walked. I walked for 20 minutes and was out of there. I wasn't joking when I said I was easing in to this, huh?! But hey, I had dinner plans, okay?!

My ultimate goal for the weeks in the off-season would be something like this:

• Run 3 times per week, twice during the week for 30 - 40 minutes, once on the weekend for a longer run of 5 - 8 miles. I'm not sure how I'm going to manage that through the winter months, but I'll have to get creative! Your suggestions would be gladly accepted!
• On weekday running days, also do pilates DVD. Yes, I bought the Windsor Pilates a couple years ago and it kicks ass! At first you can't even make it though the 20 minute workout! Once I mastered that, I still could never make it all the way through the longer one!
• Cross-train twice a week. Do anything I please (that isn't running) for at least 30 minutes. The biggest challenge I think will be making sure I'm doing different things...not just one activity over and over. But this has the potential to be fun!
• On cross-train days, do a total body strength training circuit. I love lifting! If lifting burned fat the way that cardio does, I'd be 20lbs lighter! I'm going to have to make sure that I don't get carried away with this...just hit the major muscle groups twice a week. No need to gain lots of ground in the muscle department. I love watching the amount I can lift go higher and higher, but that isn't necessary right now...just have to concentrate on keeping my body strong and balanced.

That's the plan. Will it happen? Who knows! I'm going to gradually start working each piece in so that I don't burn out by next week! Right now, the focus is just getting used to doing physical activity again on a regular basis...since I've been pretty much the Queen Lazy-Ass for the past couple of months. I guess I thought I earned it or something from all that running...all I seemed to really have earned is about 6 pounds!

I'm excited...I need you all to hold me accountable though. Maybe I'll create some kind of log I can post weekly or something to show how its progressing. Hey...that is a mighty fine idea, Nicole!

I'm nervous

Well...I'll be honest here...since, you know, honesty is good. I haven't run a single step since the marathon. I think I was a little mentally defeated. Everytime I think about lacing up, I just get this feeling of dread about how uncomfortable running will be...cuz, you know, the last time I ran was in awful, yucky conditions. I can't seem to shake the experience from my mind.

Yesterday, I took the first step and joined the gym that opened up in my office building...and that gave us an absolutely ridiculous rate! There was no excuse not to sign up! It's small and well, honestly, the potential that one of my co-workers may see me naked in the locker room scares the bejesus out of me! But, overall, its a great situation. I can lift weights during lunch and then get cardio in right after work. Which means I can get a full workout in without getting home at 9pm! This is very, very good!

I packed up all my workout gear this morning and then almost walked out the door without it :) That's how long its been since I went to a gym straight from work! But, I'm excited to get going again, this time with new goals in mind. And I'm nervous that its going to suck and I'm going to hate it. I guess only time will tell...

Portland 2008

I admit it...I'm not quite over the fact that Pinkowsky couldn't acknowledge an iota of blame for the Chicago "Fun Run" debacle! So, I think I've figured out a way to turn my sour feelings around. I'm going to run the Portland Marathon in 2008 instead of the Chicago again. Portland is my hometown and I'd love to have all my family and friends on hand to cheer me on! The two races are only scheduled a week apart so I could still train with a Chicago group next summer without getting off track!

This idea has totally got me psyched to get my butt back in gear! Now, I just have to figure out how to keep it in gear over the winter...do I really have to have daily meetings with the dreadmill? I see no other way! At least the off-season will give me time to work on strength training and I'll be sure to cross train so I don't burn out on running like I did this summer. I want to start the next training season in 5 times a better place than I was this year! I hope I stay this excited when I have to hit the gym later... :)

Vegan Baking

Sunday begins the official start of the vegan baking experiment. My friend and I have been talking for months and months (and months!) about opening a cafe/bakery specializing in vegan, organic, gluten-free, etc items and yet it's always been just talk. But not anymore! This weekend we have officially scheduled a date to get down to the nitty-gritty and see how tough this vegan baking can be! On the menu:

Carrot Cake Cupcakes w/ Vegan Cream Cheese Frosting
Green Tea Cupcakes w/ Green Tea Glaze & Almond Flowers
Cinnamon Scones w/ Cinnamon Icing

I've been excited all week! I don't know how I'll make it to Sunday without exploding! I love to bake and I love a challenge, so I can't wait to see what is going to happen! I'll post pics (if I remember the camera) when we get going! Now if only we could find some taste testers... :p

Post Marathon Weight Gain???

Okay, so I'm writing about this here in hopes that someone will raise their hand and say this is completely normal! Basically, since I cut back (and eventually completely stopped) my running about 6 to 8 weeks ago, I've been gaining weight at a pretty steady (and fairly scary) rate. Now, at first I thought it was probably due to the fact that I was still "carb loading", yet not "carb burning"...aka running :) Therefore, I wasn't alarmed in the least bit when I saw the needle on the scale move up a couple notches.

About 3 weeks ago, I finally came back to reality and started eating like a normal human being. Stopped eating lunch out every day. Cut back on all the pasta I'd been loving so much. Basically, got back to the way I was eating before I started all the training. Well, since then...I've managed to gain even more weight!!! Now I'm freaked out!

Please, someone tell me this is some normal whacked out reaction of my metabolism from not running anymore! Tell me that it will regulate soon and things will return to normal! Or do I seriously have some weird hormonal/chemical imbalance I should have checked out by the Doc? And before anyone throws it out there, No, I'm not pregnant :)

Seriously though, if anyone has experienced this or has any insight whatsoever, please let me know! Before my clothes stop fitting! :)

It finally happened...

I seriously pulled a muscle! Not from running, mind you. From bowling! How do you do all that running and never really get too sore and then manage to do yourself in at the bowling alley? This is ludicrous! Or however you spell that!

I wrecked all kinds of havoc on myself out there Friday night! My left hammy is sore, the bridge of my right foot hurts, my right shoulder is tired and I broke a nail! Bowling is dangerous. I think there should be warning signs posted around!

All in all, it was a great time though! I've only bowled a few times in my almost 30 years and it was so much fun! Granted, I suck...but who cares! My lone goal was to score over 100. It was not attained :) But, I did manage to increase my score each game! My highest was 93...I won't get into what the first score was! We only bowled 3 games though because, well, that was all we could afford! On a Friday night, it was $38/hour to bowl! We could have gone to the movies for cheaper and longer! When something costs more than a night at the movies, you know there is a problem!

I'll have to be sure to go back...before noon on a weekday. That's when its only $8/hour. Yeah. Right. :)

A New Kind of Running

So, it's over. Weird. All that time, money, planning, worrying...and just like that, it's over.

No more "scheduled" runs. No more distances I must get to. Freedom.

YES! Now I can just run to run. Run when I feel like it. For as long, far, short, fast, slow as I want. This is going to be great! Time to get back to the basics and remember why I wanted to do this whole marathon thing anyway. I'm actually excited for my first "freedom" run. And let me tell you, I don't get excited to run very often! I'm thinking I may wait for that nice cool, crisp, sunny Saturday coming up. And just run until I stop. It's going to be great.

Wow...

I didn't realize at the time that I wrote that last blog what had really happened at the marathon. Turns out my decision to stop wasn't so bad after all...they actually canceled the race about a half hour after I had called it a day. Conditions were too hot and they had run out of ambulances to help people who needed it! They straight made people turn around and walk back...I'm glad I did it when I was close to the start area instead of way out west.

The worst part is that race officials are denying that water stations were out of supplies! Can you believe that? What reason so us runners have to lie about it. And how would so many of us have the same story if it were not true? Worst of all, he is blaming the runners for taking TOO MUCH water on a day where the temps were 88 degrees while runners were still going?! Are you kidding me? This race director has absolutely no class! I realize these conditions were off the charts, but please do not lie about what really happened? Canceling the race? I understand why they had to do it. But lying about the water stations? Uncalled for!

And there are some runners saying that they didn't see any stations without water...maybe that would be because they were closer to the front of the pack? Ya think?

I still want to run a marathon, but now I'm not sure that I want to give my money back to the same marathon that is denying their role in the failure of the event. Maybe it would be best to find another city to run it in? I guess I'll get that all figured out in a few months!

Again, to everyone who completed the marathon on that brutal day, my hat goes off to you! You are amazing! And to those family, friends and spectators who brought out water and hoses and whatever else you could find to help us out, you are life savers. Literally! I hope you know how much you helped us all!

DNF

Yes, its official. I Did Not Finish. And I wish I could say I was trucking along with all my might when the course decided I was not fast enough and turned me back, but no. It was me. I made the decision to quit. Ironically, I think it was right where they make the people not clocking a fast enough time turn around...but it turns out that was quite a bit after I passed that mark.

So, why did I give up? Well, first of all, it was hot as hell. And then, de ja vu, the water stations ran out of water! Seriously, you have people running a marathon in 80+ degree weather and you don't have a back up plan for water stations running out?! Ridiculous! But most of all, my feet hurt...bad. Those ugly, nasty calluses I developed during training and that I hated so much because they kept me from being able to wear all my cute summer shoes...turns out they were there for a reason. They have almost fully gone away during my lack of training here at the end and I paid the price for that today. My feet were killing me.

I got to the half way point and I said to myself, "Self, is it worth it? Is it worth the suffering you are about to endure for at least another two and a half hours to get that medal?" And the answer was no. So, I veered off course and headed back to Grant Park. Defeated.

Am I upset? Not really so much, surprisingly. Even though I really was hoping to finish today, I think I'd already written it off way back in my mind somewhere. I truly do not feel bad. I wish I had the 30th anniversary medal instead of one I'll get in the future (Because I will keep trying until I beat this thing!), but other than that, I'm really kind of happy I'm not still out there...dying. To everyone who did finish...I commend you tremendously! It was not pretty out there and you didn't even let it phase you! You are my hero!

I guess this means this blog is not over yet...on to the 2008 Chicago Marathon!

This is it

Right after I write this, I'm going to go to bed. I'm going to wake up way too early and head out into the heat. I'm going to run the marathon. In 88 degree highs. I'm not even sure of my strategy at this point, but I know I will be out there. And I will do whatever I can to make sure I cross that finish line. This is it.

Big sigh...

My lack of blogging is primarily due to fear. Fear of the marathon. Yes, kids, its finally here. Sunday to be exact.

At first I was scared because the most I've run any given week for the last 6 is twice. Yeah, burnout is a bitch. But, I figured I'd just go out on marathon day and have a good time. Run, jog, walk, skip, whatever. Enjoy the crowd and have fun, ya know? No big deal.

Well, there is a new fear brewing...the weather is forecasted to be 88 and sunny that day! What the hell? Did someone forget to tell them this is October? In Chicago? Yeah, we are talking we are about to break a record high. Seriously. Now, I'm thinking its not going to be fun no matter what. Being under trained and having heat stroke? That I may not be able to convince myself to suffer through?

So, now, I don't even know what to do. Great.

27th Mile Celebration!

Marathoners, listen up!

Running Jayhawk is so graciously organizing a post marathon brew fest! Come out to relax and unwind from your amazing feat! Please leave a note in my comments or Jayhawk's if you want to come so she can reserve enough space for us all! Here are the details:

Who? YOU!
What? The 27th Mile Celebration...RBF Meet Up...Post-Race Celebration
When? Sunday. 10/7 at 6:30
Where? Garrett Ripley
Why? Because you just ran 26.2 miles, want to meet some RBFers, will need a drink, and can unload your tales of blisters and trots and walls to people who actually understand :)

Hope to see you there!

Think Success!

I was talking about my intent for the marathon with a co-worker today and she asked me if I had run a 10k race this summer. My response was that not only did I run a 10k, I ran a 10 mile race, a half marathon and multiple other double digit distances on my own! That is when I realized that just because the marathon isn't turning out the way I expected, doesn't mean that I have not been successful this year!

Things have been WAY stressful at work and I think it has just thrown me into an all-around negative state of mind. And I don't want to be that way! I want to be proud of myself for what I accomplished instead of basing everything on what I didn't! So, no more! Marathon or not, I am proud of myself!

My leg is finally feeling some relief, although I suppose that could have something to do with the fact that I haven't been putting it to use much...but whatever! We all have our own versions of therapy, okay?!

I think my running will pick up again when the marathon passes and I have that big ol' gorilla off my back! Until then, positive thoughts...positive thoughts...positive thoughts...

It ain't lookin' good, folks!

I think I've been averaging less than 10 miles a week! Seriously, I do not know what happened! I just suddenly couldn't get myself to run if my life depended on it! I'm truly sad now, whereas before, I didn't really care. The reality of not running this marathon is setting in. And while I hate to say I won't be out there...the thought of suffering through HOURS to get to the finish line is scaring me to death. And of course, I hate to think that this training got the best of me! I hate losing! But is walking who knows how many miles after running who knows how many more really winning? This bites.

On the upside, I've already discussed next year with my potential training buddy and its looking good. I really think that will make a huge difference! I'm obviously not disciplined enough to do it on my own :) Most people seem to run with someone or a group and I guess I just wasn't cut out to make it on my own. Who knows. Maybe I'll just get out there and go as far as I can...and attempt to walk the rest. How long is the course open again? :p

Nothing about running

I usually keep this blog about running...cuz that is what I created it for! It's rare that I go off topic, but here goes...GREEN BAY ROCKS!!!!! That's right, I'm a Packer fan living amongst the enemy! 3-0 Baby!!! Just took down the Chargers and it feels great! That is 7 wins in a row and Brett is breaking all kinds of records...this could be the note for him to finally go out on! I wouldn't want to see him retire after any of the less than stellar seasons we've been having! Go Brett! Go Pack! Yeah!!!!

I was missing out!

I had planned to run last night, but it has been a timing issue with the sun setting earlier these days. I've been running around my neighborhood because I feel safer there in the dark than on the lake front path, but its getting boring and the sidewalk is a bitch on my knees. I really, really wanted to get to the lake front last night, but I couldn't make it work before dark. So, "lightbulb", I get the idea to ride my bike (okay, not MY bike, but the one I borrowed and now claim as my own) to my friend's place (and get at least a little exercise in) and then run in the morning. I pack up all my stuff into a backpack and head out about 8:15pm.

Since it was dark and I had no lights or reflective gear...or helmet...I figured I better stay on the busy, well lit streets. Which meant Ashland. Yeah right, my scaredy cat self was not about to try to ride with traffic on Ashland...its scary enough being in a car! So, I did the unthinkable in Chicago...I rode on the sidewalk! There wasn't hardly any foot traffic so it actually wasn't a problem at all.

Let me tell you how much I truly enjoyed this ride!!! First off, I make this commute fairly often. It's only 4 miles, but with traffic, it can be the most stressful 20 minutes ever! Being on the bike, I could just cruise. No being stuck behind slow pokes or being cut off by a crazy cab driver. It was sooooo relaxing. Plus, you notice stuff you would never notice from your car. There were families sitting on their stoops and all kinds of different music coming from houses and bars. I was so loving the experience! There was a creepy part where I had to ride passed this huge cemetary. Its way different to be outside a car and cruising by in the dark. I had this mantra running through my head, "just look straight ahead, just look straight ahead..." Creepy.

And the best part of all? I didn't have to cruise around the neighborhood for 20 minutes looking for a parking spot! There was absolutely no downside! I can't believe I haven't done this before! I've got to make this a habit! It only took 30 minutes...barely more than it takes to drive...and probably less when you figure in time to park!

And then guess what? I actually ran this morning! Granted, it was only 3 miles because I slept later than I had planned and didn't have time for more, but it was something! Overall, this was a great plan! And I love the bike!

Hit me like a truck...

I woke up this morning and the weirdest thing happened. The first thought in my head was that I don't want to run this marathon! What the?! How do you just wake up one morning and think something like that?

I think I did have a reality check this weekend. I went out Friday night and ran into some friends I hadn't seen for awhile. When they asked me how the training was going, the first thing I said was that I was burnt out. That I just wanted it to be over. I don't think that is the response I'm supposed to be having right now! With less than 3 weeks to go, shouldn't I be excited?! Shouldn't I be telling them that I'm more ready than ever to knock out these 26 miles? That it feels great to be looking towards a taper and resting my body? But that wasn't what I said. I said I was burnt out. Tired. Stressed.

If that is how I feel, how do I expect to get truly rallied and complete this race? I guess at this point, that means this is up in the air. A game time decision. I'm sad about it...and relieved all at the same time. I can think of a number of reason why it didn't work out. And I can think of a thousand solutions if I could do it all over again. But I can't. I am here, 3 weeks from the marathon and severely under-trained. And my knees hurt :)

I've still accomplished a lot this season. I've run father than I ever have before. I've gotten more miles under my belt than I ever imagined at this point in my life. Running became a part of my life again when I was at a point where it was the elliptical trainer or nothing. I've learned about the power of the mind...and the weakness of it. I've learned that my body isn't invincible and I have to learn to work with it and not against it. I've learned that I don't want to do this alone. And that I need the support of my friends and family more than I thought I did. I've learned that Gatorade gives me yucky tummy and Shot Blocs are not the save all :)

Wow...Jon just called me in the middle of writing this and we had an excellent talk about it! Thank you for being a continuous inspiration for me and for always being there to listen to my struggles and have profound words. You help me more than you know and you continue to be my role model in all this!

Bottom line: I don't know what is going to happen on race day. I'm not sure I'm officially ready to concede just yet, but I know that finishing is a long shot. We'll see...

On the move...

The compromise seems to be working...sort of. I've ran twice this week...yeah, I know, ONLY TWICE? But hey, twice is better than none, which is where I've been the last couple of weeks! I plan to run 5 miles tonight and do 10 on Sunday. The runs have been tough for how short the distance is, but I guess that is what happens when you fall off the wagon!

I didn't want to mention this before because I didn't want people to think I was making excuses for my lack of running besides the fact that I just didn't want to. BUT...I think I have once again pulled my IT Band! This little bugger is what stopped me from running the Portland Marathon years ago. I think it happened on my last long run a few weeks back. I didn't run much after that so I was kind of hoping the feeling wouldn't resurface. But after these past couple of runs...It's baaaaack!

It's not necessarily a pain feeling...more of just a "sensation" on the outside of my left leg while I run. There is a definitely point on the outside of my left knee that is feeling weird. It only bothers me when I run and when I walk up stairs. I figure I'll just ignore it until after the marathon and then figure out what to do! Unless it gets bad enough to the point that I'm in pain...that will not do!

I hope my run tonight goes well cuz after that I'm off for a night on the town. Been awhile since I went out and had a good time! Training is a killer on the social life!