So, it wasn't all bad...

I may have been a little biased after the half when I wrote that last blog. I'm feeling much better now! Actually, I feel like I'm more determined than ever to make this marathon a success!

Here is the awesome medal we got for finishing:





And best of all...my number had my name on it! Yeah!!



So, yeah, maybe it wasn't all bad.

The Half

All I got to say right now is, That was ONLY half??? Holy crap. Put a fork in me, I'm done!

Things started off looking great. The hot weather that they had warned us about in an email sent Saturday never came. Luckily, I storm had rolled in about 4am and cooled everything off. We could not have had better weather for a race scheduled in mid-August!

The race started...and I was in a porta-potty. I kid you not. I ran for the starting area and luckily there were so many runners that my pace group was still nowhere near crossing the start line. Finally, get across and start running. I feel fine...immediately start passing up all the slow people that feel the need to line up in the front corrals. Water stations are placed very nicely, we are running through the Loop so we are shaded by all the buildings. Spectators on the corners. Things looking very good.

Mile 5 takes us out of the Loop and over towards the lake...this is where things begin to go downhill. First, at Mile 6, my Ipod battery dies. Dammit! Why didn't I think to charge it?! Let me just tell you that that sucker is charging off my computer as I sit here and write this! That will not happen again! No way Jose!!! Shortly thereafter, I feel the need to go to the bathroom. Runners, you know what I'm talking about and you know how distracting this becomes. I was pretty sure there would not be a restroom until after the turnaround so I was starting to freak out a little bit.

Miles 7 water stop. NO FREAKIN' CUPS!!!! What the?! This is a huge race. How the hell do you run out of cups at a water station?! I keep running, no hydration. Mile 8 water stop. NO FREAKIN' CUPS!!! I was about to lose it! I spotted one guy who had brought some cups of his own or something and quickly ran to him. I was lucky to get one of about the last 20 he had. Believe me, I held onto this cup because I was not going to have to skip another water break!

I'm now starting to feel tired. My feet hurt and my body is going through the motions, but not in a controlled powerful way...more in a survival way...just keep moving. The urge to go to the bathroom faded...but don't worry, it reared its ugly head again around Mile 10 :)

Those last few miles...I don't even know how I made it. I just kept moving for fear that if I stopped, I may never start again. It was bad. At the Mile 12 water stop, I decided it was time for a little walk. I walked about 1/4 mile before I picked it up again for the home stretch. As I got to the finish, all I could think was that if a marathon means doing twice this much, I don't want to do it! Seriously, I'm now dreading the marathon :( This is not good.

Let's give 'em something to talk about!

Or, at least, I gave myself something to talk about! :) My awesome run tonight!! Granted it was only 4 miles and 4 miles SHOULD be a cake walk. But it isn't always. Sometimes 4 miles is 3 miles too long. Sometimes 4 miles feels more like 8. Sometimes 4 miles just doesn't seem worth the effort.

Oh, but tonight was different! Tonight, 4 miles was amazing! Somewhere in the first half mile I just started flying. I didn't even notice until I passed another runner...and then I was like, what pace am I keeping right now?! Granted, fast to me right now is about a 10 minute mile :) I wish I would have worn my watch! Dang it! Not only was my pace great, but I wasn't physically tired...and best of all, I never got mentally tired! Not once did I want to stop or have to talk myself out of going further.

I just ran. Plain and simple. I just ran.

12 Miles...what does it mean?

I actually managed to run 12 miles on Saturday! I think I have set out twice before to reach this mileage and given up both times. But I did it! Here is the thing: I felt very confused afterwards. On the one hand, I felt great! I FINALLY managed to run 12 freakin' miles! I proved that I can pass the 10 mile wall I kept hitting! That made me realize that my mind is getting stronger...my body, maybe a little :)

On the other hand, while it was great that I did it, those 12 miles were no walk in the park. The last 4 miles, specifically. I wanted to stop like you do not even know! I did two 6 mile loops...so it was 3 out and 3 back, twice. If I had done 6 out and back, I don't think I would have made it. By the time I was hitting 8 miles, it was ALL about the short goal game. And when I finished, I don't think I could have taken another step..let alone another mile, like the half marathon this Sunday.

So, what does this mean? I feel great to have a successful run, but I also feel exhausted and stressed. I hate how hard it is to stay mentally focused on the long runs. And to think, I have to run twice that?! I know a marathon isn't supposed to be easy. That is why most people will never run one. But, man!! I can't lose focus now...it has to be all or nothing for the next 2 months. Can I do it?

Bad Nicole

After such a triumphant Wednesday, I failed to drag myself out of bed for 6 miles this morning! I'm so mad at myself right now. Why is it so hard for me to get up early? I keep thinking that someday I'm going to break the cycle, but it doesn't seem to be happening! I have 12 miles tomorrow and with high temps and thunderstorms in the evening, it can only be done in the morning. Which means it probably isn't a good idea to try to make up those 6 miles tonight. Dang it! I'm kicking myself right now! Especially, because my marathon friend gave me a long speech last night about how I should train to make the marathon a cake walk, not settle for training just enough to be able to finish. That this doesn't have to be as hard as I'm making it. That I should want more than that. And I did...until 5am when my alarm went off. Then I was right back ready to settle :)

I went, I ran, I conquered!

I had 7 miles on the agenda last night...uh, did anyone see how hot it was at 7:30? It was still eighty-freakin'-three degrees! I sat and debated. Drive to the lake, hope for a nice breeze, get caught in knat swarms, hope I don't get jumped in the dark OR run 3/4 miles to the gym, clock 5.5 miles on the dreadmill, run 3/4 miles home. Hmmmm...neither one of those sounded much fun. Got my running clothes on cuz you know sometimes that is enough to make me feel guilty about not going at all :) And I decided to give the gym plan a try. I told myself that I would just run for as long as I could on the dreadmill without going insane.

I leave the house with towel and water bottle in hand. I don't usually carry anything when I run so this quickly became annoying! Didn't feel too bad with the sun down so things were looking good. Just as I'm approaching the gym and reach to my pocket for my card...dun dun dun!...my card is not there! Fell out while I was running! Oh brother!!!! Back-track I go! Crossing my fingers and hoping that it isn't sitting a block from my house, I manage to luck out and see it sitting smack dab in the middle of Ashland!!! Traffic zooming all around it! When the signal turned to walk, I ran out and grabbed it and headed back to the gym, which luckily wasn't that far.

Run straight for the first treadmill I see so that my heart rate doesn't slow down too much and I am pleasantly surprised to find that they have upgraded their equipment and gotten the treadmills with the fans on them! Yes!!! Air happily blowing on me, running at a 10:30 pace, I'm feeling stupendous! About 20 minutes in, I'm a bit less stupendous. By 35 minutes in, I'm debating myself about getting off. Fan or not, I've decided I still hate the treadmill! I tell myself to make it to 4 miles and then I can re-evaluate. By the time I get to 4 miles, I'm getting my second wind and start playing the short goal game. Just get to 50 minutes. Just do 2 more laps...yeah, it also had a little visual track and showed you going around it. And lo and behold...I did the full 60 minutes!!! I hopped off, gulped down some water and headed out for the run home.

My legs felt like jello because the motion of running on real ground is way different than on the treadmill...it felt really weird to run and I wasn't trusting my legs much! I cross Ashland, not more than 50 feet from the intersection and I hear my key fall out of my pocket!!! What is going on with my pocket today?! By now, it is dark. I cannot find my key to save my life! I'm looking under cars, all over the side walk, over this little ledge that leads to a parking lot. I'm starting to panic! Finally, a car comes driving by and the headlights pass over something shiny. My key! Thank you!!! I kid you not, I was looking for about 5 minutes, even took off my Ipod like somehow it might help if I could hear my key...like maybe it would yell, "Over here!"

By now, the running vibe is dead. I try to muster a little something and run to Elston and catch the red light. I figure that is my sign to just walk the remaining 1/4 mile. Overall, I am extremely proud of myself for staying on that treadmill and getting my planned run done. The weather can no longer be an excuse. I have to train and train right! I just hope that there will be more days that feel this good!

And one more thing...

After a few runs now where I've had the chance to stop at a hydration station and mix some water up with Gatorade (vs. just using water fountains to hydrate), I seem to get tummy aches. I can only assume this is from the Gatorade, as that has been the only difference in my runs. I bought some shot blocs, but haven't tried them yet. Will this be sufficient for electrolyte replacement on those longer runs? Has Gu worked better for people? I've never used this type of replacement product so I'm curious as to people's reactions to them. Thanks for any info you can offer!

Thank You, Bloggers!

This has been far from an easy ride so far! There have been triumphant moments, but more often than not, it has been rough going. I've questioned my ability, my heart, my will and my sanity :) There have been moments (like right now) where I just cannot wait to feel what it will be like to cross that finish line...I have no doubt in my mind that there will be tears involved! There have been moments where I wanted to quit and never have to run again. There have been runs where I couldn't have been prouder of myself for getting out there and getting the job done. And there have been runs where I walked halfway home. It has been such a rollercoaster and such a mixed bag that its hard to tell where the next turn will lead.

But you know the one consistent part? Being inspired by all the other Chicago Marathon Bloggers out there! Yes, there are a few blogs I stalk nearly daily! Not only has it helped me to read where you all are at in your training right now, but your archives are my oasis! Most of you ran your first Chicago Marthon last year, so going back through your archives and seeing where you were in your training at the point that I'm at in mine now has been a life saver at times! To know that I'm not the only one who struggles with this. That its okay to miss some runs. That injuries can be worked through. That the heat will not kill us. Because you all went through these things too...and you all crossed that finish line last year!

Thank you, Bloggers and keep writing!!!!

Reality!

I just got my confirmation email for packet pick-up for the Chicago Distance Classic...that means the half marathon is almost here!!!! That email was such a wake up call for me! My first half marathon in over 5 years! My first medal! My first real reality check as to how this marathon is going to shape up! And the crazy thing is that I'm sooooo excited! They are going to have pace groups and I think that it will really benefit me. I just have to figure out what group to run with. My pace in my last 2 races has been much quicker than usual: 10:14 & 10:40 (if I remember correctly). BUT, those were both shorter races. An 11 minute mile pace would put me at a 2 hour 26 minute finish. The paces groups are 2:15 and 2:30. Do I start in the 2:15 and see how it feels? Do I go with the 2:30 and leave them in the dust if I can do better? Decisions, decisions! At least I'm excited rather than terrified! I know I can do this...despite my crappy commitment to my training :)...and I just can't wait to cross that finish line!!!

Just writing to write...

Not a whole lot to report at this point. Last week's new schedule went suprisingly fabulous. This week, however, was another story! Due to long hours at work, I only made it out for 2 runs, neither of which was my long one. I have my Nike Women's 10k tomorrow so that will be fun...except I picked up my stuff yesterday and my shirt has a stain on it! WTF? Out of all the shirts they have for this race, I get the stained one? Bogus, man, bogus!

I really need to be getting my long runs in if I'm going to run this marathon. At this point, I'm pretty convinced there will be a stretch where I walk. That bites. Just barely over 2 months to conquer this thing!

Transition Successful

So far, anyway! I knocked out my 10 miles on Saturday with minimal problem. Again, I waited until the evening to avoid the heat...and getting up early :) I found that I definitely ran out of mental stamina before I did physical. I just get bored way too fase, especially running the same route over and over. Music isn't enough to distract me. I was tired when I got done, but I'd say it was the easiest 10 miles I've done yet. And I didn't even wear my heart rate monitor!

I was all jazzed to get up this morning and begin the conversion to AM running...yeah, that was until the alarm went off! I was like, hell no!!!! So, I didn't :) Luckily, its only 5 miles and the evenings seem to be cooling off nicely. I will definitely get it in tonight! I may have to move my long run to Friday night because I have the Nike Women's 10k on Sunday morning. 12 miles on a Friday night doesn't seem to exciting, but then again, I'll have all day Saturday to lay around and recover!

I ate this little pastry about an hour ago and I'm already beginning to feel the fatigue take hold...oh no...

It's On...

Anyone living in Chicago knows that my 8 miles did not happen on Wednesday night. We had ridiculous thunderstorms and the rain just wouldn't quit. I ran about 4 house lengths from my car to my place and was drenched! The "had to strip down and towel myself off" kind of soaking! So I went out last night instead to try to get the miles in. And I did! The weather was perfect...except a serious headwind the whole way back :( That was rough. The best part was that it wasn't hard! I think I could have kept going! Maybe it's the mornings that are messing me up. That is the only thing I can think of. You don't have much fuel in your system, your body isn't really awake yet. That is no excuse since the marathon is in the morning and I'll have to figure out a way to make mornings better. My original schedule said to do 11 miles Saturday, but this new one is 10...not sure which I'll go for...maybe whatever I can manage! So far, things are looking up!

Almost...

I wrote that little confession blog yesterday after I had made the same confession to my two marathon/triathalon friends. Let me tell you, they whipped my thinking back into shape in a heartbeat! One told me to throw away that crap training schedule I was on because it wasn't doing enough to build my endurance. He then adjusted his schedule from his training last year to something that I could work with and told me to DO IT!!! So, I did :) There is waaaaaaay more running in this schedule (5 days vs 4 day a week) and the distances are definitely greater. It might kill me. For real. But, with how I've been struggling, I figure its worth a shot.

It started with 5 miles last night. Those 5 miles were great! But, the first run back is always great because your body is fully rested and recovered. I waited until just as the sun was setting since things have been getting a little hot around here. That didn't stop the humidity from being annoying though! And once the sun was down, oh geez...watch out for the bug swarms!!! You can't see them until you are in them, literally. And I was sweating so I'd get the occasional knat stuck to my face! Gross! The upside? Lightning bugs!!!! We don't have those back in Oregon, but I remember the days of spending summers back east to visit my family (my mom is from the Big Apple) and every night me and the girl that lived next door to my grandparents would go outside and try to catch them. It was such a highlight for me since I only got to see them once a year! So, last night, I'm running along and its starting to get creepy dark and I'm having thoughts about getting abducted from the path and then I see it! That little greenish glow for just a second! A smile immediately jumped on my face! For the last mile and a half, all I did was watch for lightning bugs. For some reason, that just made the run for me! I then proceeded to miss the final mile marker sign in the dark...must have been in some trees or something and I almost got lost :) In the dark, on the lake...scary.

Tonight I'm supposed to run 8 miles. This is intimidating me severly. For one, we are having storms and the weather may not make this a good run. Then there is just the fact that it is 8 miles. That is almost an hour and a half of running. It will take my whole evening. I hate that.

This is the test

I'm truly struggling right now. After 2 bad weekend runs in a row, my motivation is crap. I didn't run at all last week and haven't so far this week either. I've been seriously beginning to feel like I don't want this bad enough. It's been RELAXING not to run for a week! To not have to wake up at the crack of dawn or feel guilty for NOT waking up. To not have to battle the heat when all you want to do is curl up on the couch in your central A/C. To not have to give up another Friday night of fun because you have a 6am run to get to. This isn't fun anymore. As Jon put it, I lost my Eye of the Tiger...he suggests I watch Rocky III :)

I don't want to be a quitter. How do I get the will back? The want back? This frustrating in such a major way because a part of me would be so relieved to throw in the towel...but the other part doesn't want to have invested so much time, energy and of course, money for nothing! Augh! I'm told every runner goes through this in their training and I can't let it stop me. I have to move forward and passed it because nothing will feel as great as crossing the finish line in October. Help...

Ouch!

In so many ways... First of all, my boy Jon was visiting and decided to run my long run with me this week. He is currently involved in triathlons, but hadn't run a distance this long ever. We set out and I knew I was going to fast, but I felt pressure because he is in such good shape, I thought he would get bored running so slow. Well, by 5.5 miles my heart rate was way too high and I decided I needed to walk a bit. Believe it or not, he went on ahead without me! AND he finished the whole 9 miles! He is my hero! I alternated between running and walking the remainder of the 3.5 miles. So, that was ouch number one.

Then, we had signed up to do the Race for the Taste 5k on Sunday. I was already tired from Saturday's run. I haven't gotten to sleep in for 2 weeks. And, basically, I just didn't want to do it! But, Jon was not having that! Got my butt up at 6am. We got ready and headed down to Grant Park. He decided he was gonna run this 5k for time since that is the length he runs for his tris. I, on the otherhad, was just going to try to finish it without walking! Once it started though, I pushed myself to not just jog, even though my body was tired. I ran it faster than I run my usual runs, but still probably not as fast as I could have if I hadn't have run on Saturday. I ended up finish in at just over a 10 minute mile pace. I'll take that! That was ouch number two.

As part of the goodie bag for Race to the Taste, you got a free strip of tickets. But, the Taste didn't open until 11am and the race ended around 9:30. So, we hung out and waited. Then walked around it for a bit. Then ate. Then finally decided to head home. Um, let's just say a little sunblock might have been a good idea! I was fried! It didn't look so bad at the time, but as the day wore on and the burn "developed"...wow. And ouch number three.

Now, I'm exhausted. I ran both days. I didn't sleep too well last night cuz of the burn. And I'm tried of getting up early :)

100

That is how many days left until the Marathon! I signed up when there were exactly 200 days left. So, it is officially the half-way point. I wish I felt like I was at a more successful place in my training. Another bad week. I've only run once! I have seriously been debating a short run tonight, but with 9 miles in the morning, I'm not sure if it would be a good or bad idea. 100 days...

It's gettin' hot in huurrrrr

So hot! Seriously! My first conclusion when I thought of running after work yesterday was No Way Jose! Then the little guilt monster started kicking in and I figured I might as well give it a try. Bad idea! The humidity was ridiculous...I was sweating like a mofo out there in just 5 minutes. And this wasn't that triumphant, glistening runner's sweat. No, this was just hot, nasty, I haven't even done anything to earn it, sweat! Augh! It was gross and mentally challenging. I ran about 20 minutes and decided I had enough of it! Plus, I was running on the streets and the cars and smells and curb jumps were getting to me...gotta stick to the lake. When I got about 3/4 of a mile from the house, I'd cooled off a little and gave it another to. Ran the rest of the way. So, not a complete failure! Although, I'm sure I looked gorgeous when I was done!

I'll do a run tomorrow morning, then a short one Friday and then down to 9 miles on Saturday. Then the Race to the Taste 5k Sunday morning. Is that too much? Should I be running 4 days in a row? :) Jon - you really want to do those 9 with me on Saturday???

Expected, but still Disappointing

So, after my two week break and only clocking 9 miles since, I still tried to run my scheduled 12 miler this weekend... Despite wanting to complete it with all my heart, my legs gave out first :( I forced myself to do ten, but I couldn't for the life of me push myself a step further! I can't even begin to tell you how disappointed I am that I didn't make it, even though it isn't that surprising with my injury break. But I wanted to think that I could at least mentally power myself through. That I could block out the fatigue. That I could ignore the aching foot. But alas, it was not to be.

My foot was in serious acheage all the rest of that day, but miraculously, it has been great ever since! Did it finally get that stretch it needed to calm down? I hope so!

I also volunteered at the Fleet Feet Hydration Station at North Ave on Sunday. At 6:45am. That was fun. It was cold (if you can believe it!) and balmy and no one was running. We were out there for an hour and a half before we closed up shop. It was really cool to interact with all the runners who did manage to stop by though. It is just crazy how they come in all shapes and sizes and ages, etc. Anyone can be a runner! I loved that! It was very motivational! Due to the early hour of the volunteering, I'll probably only do it here and there this summer, but it is definitely something I want to do again!

Wish me luck this week running in the high 80s, low 90s weather :(

Paid the Price

Boy, did I pay the price for my early rise yesterday. All afternoon I was head bobbing at my computer trying to keep from falling asleep. I knocked out right at 10pm and when my alarm went off this morning, I was still dead to the world! Whew! I guess that is gonna take some getting used to! I won't be seeing any sleeping in this weekend either. I have to get up for my Saturday run...although, its not going to get as hot as it has been, so rising to get to the 5:45am group run isn't as critical as I first thought. Then, Sunday I'm volunteering at the North Ave Fleet Feet hydration station...when I signed up I had no idea I would have to be there at 6:45am!!! After finding that out, I will only be volunteering once a month! :) Can't lose my entire weekend to running stuff!

Gonna take back my new shoes tonight because I think they are a half size too big and giving my blisters. They were really nice about that since I've already done a run in them. I also might try some speed work with my group on Tuesday. Maybe I do need to shoot for more than an 11 minute mile...although slow and steady is fine with me! I'd rather be slow and comfortable than fast and stressed! We'll see...

No real point to this blog except some general thoughts on the running tip. Happy Friday!

5:15am and on the move!

Yeah, you read that right...I actually got up at 5:15 this morning. And was out of the house at 5:40am. And ran 5 miles! I am not a morning person, as I'm sure you've heard me state here a million times over and I'm definitely not a morning runner. But with the heat creeping up the way it is, I know I have to make this a habit if I'm going to survive training through the summer.

The best part was that as I came through the tunnel onto the Lake Front path, there was no one on it! Seriously, one biker rode by and then again, no one. Then another biker, then no one. It wasn't until I got down towards Irving Park that I started to see people...that was such an odd experience. Usually, I'm dodging people left and right, cursing the people who walk on the little gravel pathway that I need to run on to save my knees from replacement, trying not to get run over by bike riders, etc. This morning was so peaceful...save the monologue in my mind about how much I hate running and how hard it is to run in the morning and how my foot was hurting and wouldn't it suck if that tendon just snapped right this moment and who would help me get home and...well, you get the picture :) Ipod...must remember to bring the Ipod!

Overall, I'm incredibly proud of myself for getting up, not quitting even when I wanted to and living through this pain in my foot. Maybe I need to call that doctor again...